Source AdultFYI.com, XXX church: Porn Star Needs Help, Let’s Go Craig Gross posts the following on the XXX Church blog, xxxchurch.com/blogs/news/kimberly.html regarding Houston: edited by Sophia Mounds and http://www.freefoto.com
The Porn-World thrives on the talent’s ‘numbness’ which is typically created by drugs and alcohol. When the talent is ‘numb’ the more they are willing to do. You get paid more if your willing to do “crazy-shit” but in order to do those crazy things you’ll wind up becoming a heavy alcoholic or drug addict. The more drunk and high you get, you will wind up doing “crazier-things”, your going to be willing to do and you will make more money. It’s a vicious cycle; case in point, I had sex with 620 guys in a single day. The event was a publicity stunt that was successful and won me an award for “best-selling” video of all time. Plus all the movies and crazy stuff that I did catapulted me to the top of the adult world.
Last week Jeanette and I had the great privilege to spend sometime with Kimberly formerly known as Houston. She lives in Vegas and I was speaking at their church while she was attending. We caught up shortly after that; Jeanette and I were blown away by her story. We want to share some of it here with the readers and give everyone a chance to respond. We don’t know exactly what she needs but we want to help her. I asked her to write out some of her story for me and here is what she gave me today.
My complete story and the problems I have experienced are far too common in the Porn industry. There is a family history of alcoholism, abuse. My personal history of alcoholism and drug abuse rarely lead me to good things. Go ahead and walk into any strip club or porn set in the world and you will find that 99% of the women have the same kind of story. I took porn to a whole new-level through hard-work, bad-luck and a lot of pain. I achieved national and international success. I experienced people, places and things that most people have only dreamed of. Unfortunately, those incredible highs have also been offset by horrible lows, from medical drama to addiction, divorce, kids teasing my child and now cancer.
I was also a single parent, supporting and living in LA with my daughter, I was doing bachelor parties, bikini contests and mud wrestling. At the same time I got into mainstream acting, but I didn’t make it ‘big’ fast enough. I was introduced to a porn agent and asked if I’d like to be in a porn video, they paid me very well and I thought that I had nothing to lose. The producer called me that week and asked me if I would like to be an exclusive contract girl for their company. They would pay me $10,000 a month for several films. I was sick and tired of being broke and struggling to make ends meet. That there was no question in my mind that I was going to continue to make Porn. All I thought about was the ‘fame’ and the ‘money’, not God, not disease, not my family or anything-else.
By 2002, I was still in LA so I bought myself a home in the San Fernando Valley when I was a featured stripper for 32 weeks a year all over the world. I was surviving-on-meth to keep going and I was a complete mess. I still made porn but I was basically killing myself with meth. I paid for a nanny to take care of my daughter and the nanny wound up taking care of us both. I really don’t know how she did it? She told me that she prayed for me all of the time.
Ten years went by and I became one of the ‘biggest’ porn-stars in the adult-industry’s-history. I was empty a human-shell who was full-of-hate and sadness. I felt totally alone, I even contemplated suicide and all the money in the world couldn’t make me happy or whole. By then I had been brought to my knees on several occasions. I prayed to God not to let me die this time, my heart would beat so fast, that I knew a couple of times God must have stepped in to save me.
I had enough! I knew I couldn’t die and leave my daughter without a mom. So I decided to sell my house and move as far away as I could afford from my druggie-friends and porn. After 10 years in the Porn-industry and after being inducted into the porn hall of fame. I thought; “my daughter and I could move to Vegas and start a new life, and that’s what we did.” I couldn’t handle all the people and the fans I knew I would eventually overdose if I stayed in LA.
Later; I received my real estate license and did work for a home builder. I worked their for a couple of years, trying not to wear a lot of makeup, dyed my hair brown and even gained some weight, so I wouldn’t be recognized. In April 2008 they fired me on the spot, someone in corporate recognized me. I was devastated, I was a great sales person and worked so hard. Because of my porn-career they told me that they just couldn’t have me on their front-lines, even if it was in the past.
In that mont I was diagnosed with stage III Melanoma Cancer. I was in shock! I never knew! I never had a growth removed or any kind of skin issues before. The Cancer was in my lymphatic system. In July; I had extensive surgery, to remove several lymph nodes, in both my right and left arm. I recovered for a month then in August, I was put on a drug [a form of chemo] for an entire-month, everyday-intravenously. I have to give myself injections at home three-times-a-week for the remaining 11 months. It’s a whole year of treatment and the percentages of me surviving this aren’t good… but I still have a good attitude. Everyday I have to put on my armor when I get up in the morning. I swear I will beat this demon, I have beaten worse. I know I’m special! God is going to use me to give help, hope and courage to other people. God has a blessing for me something so great that I can’t even imagine it.
My story is one of hope. That the men and women in the porn-industry can change and don’t have to let themselves be violated or exploited in order to feel ‘accepted’ or ‘loved’. That there’s a choice for them and that There are people who will help them an love them unconditionally. To show them all, that God-is-love. I will continue to learn and grow in the church for ‘God’ everyday. Even though; I cannot change my ‘past’, my ‘past’ will-not make my future. Everyone needs to learn that ‘God’ is a loving-God and He will love you.
I have accepted Jesus Christ as my Savior and have also asked for forgiveness. I know that I am worthy to be forgiven and have vowed never be a part of the Porn-World again. My daughter is attending a new church for the last 7 months. I just started going to church about 4 months ago. When I found out about XXX-church, I wanted to get-involved from the minute that I found out about what they did. I want to help women to see that they don’t have to go the Porn-route…and if I can stop being part of the Porn-World then so can they.
Gross continues: Almost-everyone that has left-the-industry walks away with nothing. If anyone has ever heard Donny talking about this, he says you never plan for a rainy-day-in-porn, you don’t save any money or plan on this money ever going away. Kimberly’s story isn’t any different; She is just trying to live a simple life, but she can’t because of the loss of her job and cancer. Her bills our pilling up and the money she once made from porn is gone, “if you have not figured that out”.
Most of you know by now, that XXX Church has developed the Esther-Fund to help people like Kimberly. For more information on the Esther-Fund go to AdultFYI.com. The XXX Church wants to help meet some of the immediate needs to pay-bills that Kimberly has. We also really want to help Kimberly do better financially. We are responsible with accountability-measures in place, so we won’t give money to just anybody without checking. We take ‘helping’ people seriously and both Jeanette and I believe Kimberly. She mentioned to us that she would really be involved in helping to spread the message of the XXX-Church and try to help other people as well. But before she can help others we want to help her.
She has been on the Howard Stern show over 50 times. She went on the Stern-show earlier this year and talked about her fight with cancer. Stern helped her raise some of the money she needs for her medical bills but all that money is gone. Why let Howard Stern do, what the ‘church’ should be doing? Please consider donating to the Esther-Fund to help Kimberly.
AdultFYI.com will keep you all, up to date on this situation. Soon we hope to introduce Kimberly to everyone on-line with some-videos or blogs or both. Keep checking back.
Thanks for reading this and please Keep Kimberly in your prayers. Pray for complete healing!